Suddenly, I became very stressed again. When there are no students, I also stressed. When there are students, I am also stressed. Why???!! When I see my schedule all packed from Monday to Saturday, I began to think....Did I fulfill my initial purpose of this pathway? Have I miss my way? Have I gone lost? Eventually, I think I have to sacrifice my Sundays!

My friend told me, "Huh? You still got leave yourself off day de ar? Thought tutor must sacrifice for your students? You still got your morning time to rest ar!" This made me re-think.. Do I really need to sacrifice my schedule to fit my students schedule even if it means working from Monday all the way to Sunday w/o any rest day? I just want one whole day to myself.. to relax and rest. You know, everyday, I need to remind myself that this time, that time I need to go tuition. Sometimes, I just wanna do something for myself also become very hard. (for example, cleaning up my room will take more than one whole day or taking a day to do activities with my friends etc.)

Yes, all these made me re-think again. Is this really what I want?? Or do I actually prefer the 9 to 5 fixed jobs with CPF, annual leave, bonuses and other benefits?? Or maybe because I just started on this road, so it will naturally be tough to walk.

Recently, I became very sensitive to money. Spending $$ to take taxi really make my heart pinch and I have become very petty about money. For example, my friday schedule make me no choice but to take taxi from one student to another. This is because I have only 30minutes to travel from Bukit Timah to Redhill which is impossible by buses!! This is a 'no-choice' arrangment as that Bukit Timah student has no other available slots and I have to accomodate to this last slot on Friday.

Another student also want to change their slot. They said they cant cope with the slot as it is too stressed and tiring for them. But if they change their slot, this means affecting my other days slot, plus it will means sacrificing my almost whole Saturday.

Ok, maybe I am just complaining too much, maybe no one see all this from my point of view, they just dont understand, they dont understand.... Haiz.. What to do... I have to just figure it out myself. I want to get that NIE certificate so that I can charge higher!!! Give me some time to think......... I cant firgure all this out!!

Emoing...Shhh...Do Not Disturb...