I have been feeling very bad. I actually forget Pushpa's and siyan's birthday. Last time when I was in secondary school, I wasn't like that. I will make a point to record down everyone's birthday and wish them happy birthday or get them presents. Probably over the years, I think nobody seems to appreciate this small action of mine and nobody remember my birthday anyway. So I grew to learn not to bother anymore. When I came to SIM, I was very touched when my clique first bought me birthday presents, especially Pushpa and Siyan. Even in our third year, they still remember my birthday and bought me presents which is really thoughtful and sweet. But I didn't really treasure that much as I thought they could have hidden agenda/motive. But then, through this ROM preparation, I realized which friends I should really treasure. I will never forget how they contribute and help me in one way or another. For friends like S.... Help her so much yet she.... Haiz.. Forget it. I seriously dont know what's on her mind anymore. I don't seem to understand anymore!! Actually this has been bugging me for very long. Since the day of gown selection, I know which friends are true to me and whom I can entrust with.


You know blog, when I initially thought of my friends whom I can entrust to help me with, I can't think of anyone. This is so sad. And now, I have a chance to make new friends and yet my dar didn't understand how I feel.... This is even sadder...... I really feel that friends whom I once close with are drifting away from me due to busy schedules. I need a life, a social life, at least I need friends whom I can entrust with.

Hence, I seriously today am very grateful to Siyan for taking her time out of her busy schedule to help me. Even though she cant read this, I seriously can't thank her enough. I need to treasure this friendship. I think my only true friends now are just 3-4? And my ROM day, I need more than that number....

Why can't just my Dardar understand? Why can't you think before you speak? Why can't you learn to understand and feel my intentions? I am really tired of reminding again and again and again. If you really want to remember, you will remember...... It's just a matter of whether you want or not.....